And Now We Wait...

For the past few months, John and I have worried, prayed, and worried some more about Mackenna and her lack of speech. It is not that she can not talk. She does talk, with both words and phrases. It is consistency that seems to be the issue. Since May, she has said several hundred new words and phrases. Yet, at times she just seems to be trying them out. Words like, "Mom;" "Daddy;" "Help;" "PaPa;" "Grandma;" "Apple;" "Yummy;" and "Uh Uh" are constants. Some of her favorite phrases are, "Getty Getty;" "Get you again;" and "Do it again." Sunday, she and John were in the grocery store. She had done something John was really impressed with. He said, "You did it." Mackenna responded, "I did it." Some mornings I hear her in her room playing with her toys after she wakes up. She will say to herself, "I did it," when she is proud of something she has done. 

Mackenna had her 3 year doctor appointment last Thursday. I have to say we must have one of the best pediatricians ever! I am so glad our second child will also be one of Dr. Beal's patients. He had asked us if we had any concerns about Mackenna, and of course we told him about her speech. As he examined her, he told her he was going to look up her nose. She put her head back and let him examine her. I have no idea where she came up with this, but as he put the stethescope on her back, she took a big breath in and then let it out. We have never taught her that, and Dr. Beal did not even ask her to do that. Guess she has seen Mommy do that a few times! She takes after Mommy in another way too. I hate tongue depressors! Mackenna almost bit the tongue depressor in half when Dr. Beal put it in her mouth. He told us she is definitely strong!

Dr. Beal asked us a lot of questions about Mackenna and her speaking. He noticed how proficiently she had been using my iPhone. He asked us questions about what gadgets she can operate, and what toys she loves the most. He told us he definitely does not see her as having Autism. When children have speech delays, Autism seems to be the first thing that is brought up. Dr. Beal told us Mackenna is empathetic, has great eye contact, loves to give hugs, and is very adaptable. Children with Autism usually have trouble reading others' non-verbal cues, do not keep eye contact, and have to stay in routines.

Dr. Beal did say he saw three things being possible. The first possibility is that Mackenna has a pervasive development disorder that is not specified. The second possibility could be high functioning Aspergers. He said that a typical 3 year old can not operate an iPhone the way Mackenna can. He told us most 3 year olds would look at an application on the phone. However, they can not turn it on, switch between applications, and turn on music and videos the way Mackenna can. When we told him Mackenna had turned the sound off on our DISH receiver, he told us children with high functioning Asperger's are attracted to gadgets and technology. Dr. Beal told us he has a friend that had childhood Asperger's. He is now a neurosurgeon and a professor at Loyola University. He also said two kids from his practice that have Asperger's are now college freshman, majoring in Engineering. He said kids with high functioning Asperger's are on a completely different plane than the rest of us, as far as intelligence. Dr. Beal told us even if Mackenna does have some problems socially, she is so smart that she will be able to pick up social cues and learn how to adapt. He did say though that Mackenna is also very easy going. This would not typically fit a child with Asperger's. The third possiblity for Mackenna's lack of speech is purely attitudinal. Dr. Beal told us Mackenna may not be talking because she simply does not want to. She may be so stubborn and passive that she just does not see a need to talk. He told us the fact that she will talk for the speech therapist and for PaPa and Grandma shows him she is choosing when she talks. Of course John and I can not figure out where she would get the stubborn streak. ;)

Dr. Beal suggested we get Mackenna evaluated at the Thompson Center at the University of Missouri in Columbia. He told us they have a 3 month waiting list, but he thinks the wait will be worth it. He told us Mackenna will go through an 8 hour testing phase. She will just think it is a fun play day. She will be observed in many areas by pediatric neuro-psychiatrists. His office referred us before we left. He told us to continue with speech therapy and keep recording what new words and phrases she says.

Tuesday, I spoke to the intake coordinator at the Thompson Center. She asked me at least a hundred questions about Mackenna. Some of the questions were related to Autism. After she was done, she told me she did not think Mackenna merited the 8 hour AR test Dr. Beal had told us about. She said that instead, Mackenna would have a 2 hour evaluation by a developmental pediatrician. We got a call to schedule this appointment. Mackenna will not be seen until January 10th. I know Dr. Beal said it could be a 3 month wait but Wow! So from now until January I guess we will be in a holding pattern.

Mackenna did say some new words yesterday for her speech therapist. I am hoping that will continue between now and January. John actually has some peace with the whole situation after we talked to Dr. Beal. I do not really know that I do. I am asking for God's comfort and peace in this situation. I know that He will not give us more than we can handle. It is just the not knowing that is killing me! Instead of worrying, I am choosing to focus on the healthy, beautiful, smart little girl I have! Any and all prayers would be greatly appreciated as we play the waiting game!