Back in 1996, I was a 22 year old college student. I had been burned so many times that dating and guys were the farthest thing from my mind during that summer. I was so fed up with excuses and broken promises that I had decided I was done with the drama. I had prayed, telling God that if He wanted me to find a guy, He would have to bring him to me. I was done looking, done dating.
In May of that year, my friend Shannon asked me if I was willing to try a blind date with a friend of hers. His name was John Clemens, and her husband Mike was John's best friend. I had seen John a few times with Mike and Shannon on campus. I remembered him from my days at Long John Silvers. I had thought he was so cute. Yet at the time, I was 17 and he was 25. I don't think my dad would have approved! She told me she thought we would be perfect together. At the time John was just turning 30. I felt he was too old for me, and I so I made up a ton of excuses to not go.
May quickly turned to June and then July. As I was entering my church sanctuary one summer morning, I sat down next to my friend, Jo. As I said "Good Morning," she quickly turned around and asked me how old was too old for me to date. I told her 30 was definitely the cut off. She said, "Oh good he just turned 30." She then told me she had found someone who was perfect for me. She could not believe she had not thought of it before. She then told me he was a paramedic she knew from the hospital. I asked her if his name was John Clemens, and she said it was. The funny thing is that Shannon and Jo did not know each other. This means I had two friends, who did not know each other, trying to set me up with the same guy. Most women would have probably seen it as a sign and immediately said yes. However, I am stubborn....
Curiosity finally got the best of me though. And honestly, I had nothing left to lose. So I told Shannon and Jo that I was ready to try a blind date with John Clemens. On the other hand, I later found out that John was just as gun shy about blind dates as I was. The fact that Shannon and Jo both thought he should go out with me (without knowing each other), also got the better of him.
So on August 3, 1996 we went out on our first date, a blind date. We doubled with Mike and Shannon. We left my house in New London, MO at 9am and traveled 2 hours to St Louis. John sat in the front seat with Mike, and the conversation on the way down to St Louis was pleasant chit chat. We arrived at the Old Spaghetti Factory at Laclede's Landing for lunch. The conversation was easy between the four of us, and the food was great. When it came to pay for our meals, I told John I would pay for mine. I was very independent back then (and still am), and I did not want a guy I did not know paying for everything on this blind date. He would hear nothing of me paying for anything. He said, "I invited you, I will pay for your meal." I said, "No actually Shannon invited me, and I am more than capable of paying for my own meal." I am sure at that point he was wondering what he had gotten himself into! :) He was quicker on the draw though, and so he did pay for the meals.
After lunch, we went to the Missouri Botanical Gardens. The four of us had probably walked around for over an hour together, taking in the flowers and the beauty that is there. We were just about to walk into a building when Shannon told Mike she wanted to look at a flower they had just walked by. I remember him asking her why. Finally, she said, "Just come on, look at it with me." Of course she was trying to give John and I some time alone. So the two of us walked into this building together. We sat on a bench. I remember asking John what Jo had told him about me. He said something like, "You are very independent with a mind of your own. You are a Sunday School teacher. And you don't let people walk all over you." I smiled and said, "Yep that's about right." We laughed, and I knew at that moment that John did not scare easy. Other guys did not want to date a woman with such a strong personality. I later found out John had told Jo that is what he wanted in a woman. Well, he got it in spades! ;)
After the Botanical Garden, we went to Forest Park and had a picnic. I met three of John's friends, Todd and Steve and Mendy. They made me feel at ease from the very beginning. This was the part of the date when I began to think that I really wanted to see John again. He was so easy to talk to, so nice, such a gentleman. After our picnic, we walked over to the Muny to see the musical "Evita." As Shannon and I were standing in line for the bathroom, she asked me what I thought of John. I told her I thought he was a nice guy. She said, "Well if you don't like him, don't go out with him again. He has been hurt a lot in the past, and I don't want to see him hurt again." I was kind of taken aback at that point. However, I admired the loyalty and friendship these three had. I later found out that Mike also asked John what he thought of me while they were standing in line in the bathroom, yet it went a bit differently. I think what Mike asked was, "So?" And John's response, "Well she's definitely in the ballpark." Aahh....how romantic! ;)
The evening progressed as we watched "Evita" on stage. Just let me say: I do not like Evita. I was trying so hard not to fall asleep during the performance. It is just not my musical. Give me "Les Miserables" or "42nd Street" any day. Just not Evita!
After the show, we drove back to New London from St Louis. On the way home, John sat in the back seat next to me. By this time, we had been together for 15 hours. Thank goodness we were getting along! It would have been a miserable day if not! I remember putting my hand in the middle of the back seat, inching it closer to John. Yet, he didn't take it. He was the perfect gentleman in every way on that first date. When we pulled in the driveway (my parents' driveway mind you), it was 2am. Our first date, a blind date, had lasted 17 hours!
The rest, as they say, is history! The next weekend we had a 14 hour date. The weekend after that, we spent the day at Six Flags together. And on September 28th of 1996, we were engaged. Shannon and Jo finally met each other at our engagement party. I have always said that when you know it's right, you know it's right! God definitely had His hand in all of it, from the way we were set up to always being the third person in our relationship.
It is amazing to me that was 14 years ago! It seems like just yesterday when we were walking together in the Botanical Gardens. We sure have seen our share of heartaches. Yet, we have seen much more of the good than the bad. The love, laughter, and blessings have been immeasurable!
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| We look so young (guess we were!), October 1996 |
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